Agent Tim Online

Hey, for those of you who havent heard agenttim has moved his site to www.agenttimonline.com . Its a great site for conservative news and insight. So go read it!

I'm Back!

Ok, in case you haven't noticed I havent posted in a REALLY long time. My mom had cookies turned off so it wouldnt let me sign on my account. whoops! (and being the computer genius that I am I didnt think to turn cookies back on) lol Hopefully I'll get a few posts up this week.

What You Didnt Know About Bread.....

**These stats (need I tell you) are completely fictional and are of entertainment value only.**
Enjoy!

Bread: The Half-Baked Truth Revealed

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.

4. Every piece of bread you eat brings you nearer to death.

5. Bread is associated with all the major diseases of the body. For example, nearly all sick people have eaten bread. The effects are obviously cumulative:

6. 99.9 percent of all people who die from cancer have eaten bread

7. 99.7 percent of the people involved in air and auto accidents ate bread within 6 months preceding the accident

8. 93.1 percent of juvenile delinquents came from homes where bread is served frequently

9. Evidence points to the long-term effects of bread eating: Of all the people born since 1839 who later dined on bread, there has been a 100% mortality rate.

10. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as a teaspoon of dough can be used to suffocate a lab rat. The average American eats more bread than that in one day!

11. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis.

12. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.

13. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.

14. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 80 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.

15. Newborn babies can choke on bread.

16. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.

17. Most bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

In light of these frightening statistics, we propose the following bread restrictions:

-No sale of bread to minors.

-A nationwide "Just Say No To Toast" campaign complete celebrity TV spots and bumper stickers.

-A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.

-No animal or human images, nor any cartoon figures or primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.

-The establishment of "Bread-free" zones around schools.

Euthanasia

I wasnt sure exactly how to spell that so I looked it up in the dictionary. I read the description and it said "also called, Mercy Killing." What is so merciful about killing, may I ask? Euthanasia(as it has come to mean) is designed to pick out the "weaker"(or "older") people and let the younger people live. It has been legalized in Switzerland and is a possibility (big surprise) for China (bunch of Commies). Oh, this is gonna work real well. Did somebody just think suddenly,"Hey lets kill the smarter, wiser generations and let the uneducated take over."??? Even if the people were begging to be killed they shouldnt be. I believe when Saul was wounded in battle he asked his sword bearer to run him through, correct? But his swordbearer didnt, he respected Sauls life. So why should we kill these people? Just because they're older? But think of this, what they may lack physically they make up for in experience and wisdom. So if Euthanasia ever makes the ballot in America (which I pray it never will), think of the older people close to you, your grandparents or ,depending on your age, even your parents. Euthanasia, in other words, is not a good idea and frankly, I cant wait until the guy who thought of this outlives his "usefulness". I think I might find him then and chuck him over the Swiss border.

Evanescence:a Christian band??

I was reading the "special thanks" notes in an "evanescence" cd booklet just recently. 2 of the artists thank God for playing such a big part in their music career. I thought that was really cool- until a couple of days ago. You see, I was on www.walmart.com and at the top of the screen on the webpages banner guess what it said? "EVANESCENCE' LATEST CD BANNED FOR USE OF THE "F" WORD"!!! I couldn't believe it! I bought their first CD and liked it-but now not only have they contradicted their "faith" by using that word in their song, they've lost a whole bunch of christian support. WORLD magazine said that you could draw many christian values out of their songs, yet they lost their nomination for the DOVE awards because of use of profanity in an interview. They lost all that because they chose to add a word to the song that the song could have done without.

Tuesday

Hey again, my parents and my brother went out today so I'm stuck at home doing school work with nothing to do but watch TV and listen to my dog whine(and blog obviously). My house is SO cold and I'm trying to figure out the Algebraic slope intercept form(as my text book calls it) of some graph. Where am I gonna have to use the "Algebraic slope intercept form" in life?!? For those of you who like interesting christian news(or are just plain bored) try Agent Tim. Its a really cool blogsite. Well I've got to get back to doing nothing. Later!

1st blog

Hey whoever may read this, Ive never really "blogged" before but Ive read about blogging quite a few times in magazines and it sounds really cool. I'll keep this updated somewhat regularly so keep my site in mind and sometime when your really bored or something come check it out. see ya later
Tim B.